Changes & Chances (Erin Jean Warde)
Thank you for hanging out with me in the changes and chances of my life. <3
Changes & Chances
Friends,
I had the once in a lifetime (I think? It’s possible I can do it again in 20 years?) chance to camp on a friend’s land, in the path of totality, to observe the solar eclipse. I’m a bit of a moon nerd, so I jumped at the opportunity. Plus, I’d never miss a chance at being in the path of totality while being only 4 hours 15 minutes away by car.
Years ago, I got to experience partial totality, and it was interesting. I made a day of it with a friend and it was so fun. But nothing really prepared me for my experience on Monday. I somehow did not realize that I would witness a sunset, celestial darkness, and sunrise, over the course of mere minutes. I continue to think — nothing prepared me for this experience, and I struggle to think of what could top it. It was genuinely one of the most stunning experiences of my life. I found myself feeling awe and wonder, feelings I wish to experience more often.
I welcomed those minutes of awe, and I would any day of my life, but especially during what has been a very busy season for me. My calendar is fuller than I could anticipate; I’ve been finding the edges of what’s possible within my time, within my body.
I’ve welcomed a big, new project into my life — and more will be revealed! — and it is claiming its rightful place within my day to day life. While it can take a lot to let “more” in, this offers me a blessing I haven’t known in 3 years — consistent income. But it’s not just consistent income, it’s the ability to have that consistency while still doing the unique vocation to which I believe God has called me, and still knowing that the work I am doing makes my spirit come alive.
I have, over the past year especially, yearned for something consistent financially, so I can lose some of the anxiety that comes with never knowing, exactly, if I will be able to pay next month’s rent. God has always provided over these 3 years, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say that the constant hustle has taken a toll on my spirit, and my body. Especially when the hustle was paired with deep, deep grief. So, the fact that I’ve welcomed an opportunity to have a consistent financial support feels very much like an answered prayer. (And again, more will be revealed in time!)
For my beloved friends in the paid community, that is why you have not heard from me in a minute, but I promise to return to you to finish up our minimalism reflections, even though we are well into Eastertide. I did not know that this opportunity would show up, so I had not already anticipated the changes in my time, or else I would have pre-written everything ages ago! I am, as they say, living and learning. But I do offer you an apology for disappearing there — I’m very sorry.
Once I’ve offered my final reflection on minimalism, I’ll be shifting some things in this space. First, let me say: I will keep offering newsletters, because they bring me joy, and I love connecting with you. However, I’m going to shift to one per week, unless I am traveling (when I typically don’t write one at all). So, instead of one newsletter per week for everyone and one newsletter per week for the paid community, I’ll offer one newsletter per week for everyone. This is just what I have to do right now, in order to be okay.
That said, I’m hoping to still do series (like the one on minimalism I am desperately trying to finish up!) and maybe do another book club (like when we read How to Do Nothing!) every now and again, while also doing one-off essays, because I enjoy offering those deeper more focused explorations. Plus, I care very much about this community here, so I want to keep it going in the ways it has existed before, just in a different way — with the difference being that whatever I offer, I’ll offer to everyone.
If you’re a paid subscriber, please know how deeply grateful I am for you. Your choice to financially support the work I do has quite literally fed me (and my sweet cats). So, my gratitude for you is immense. I also understand if this change — toward offering all my reflections for free — means you decide to no longer be a paid subscriber. As someone who struggles with money challenges, I totally understand if this becomes one way you can save some money. My hope is simply that you’ll stick around and remain a free subscriber, and keep receiving these newsletters, because I love having you here, if you want to be here!
I decided to make this change, because I’d rather be honest about my capacity and possibly lose paid subscribers than try to uphold a paid community that I’m not faithful to, due to time constraints. That’s not fair to anyone, and it wouldn’t sit well with me.
I really, really love having this community and I’m excited to continue pouring into it. If you’re receiving this message, I’m grateful for you, and I appreciate you letting me be any part of your day.
In the wild nature of my days, I keep coming back to this age old prayer from Compline (a late evening service from the Book of Common Prayer) to bring me peace and hope —
Be present, O merciful God, and protect us through the hours of this night, so that we who are wearied by the changes and chances of this life may rest in your eternal changelessness; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
Thank you for hanging out with me in the changes and chances of my life. <3
Love y’all,
EJW
EJW COMING TO SEATTLE! (May 4 & 5)
I’m very excited to share that I will be headed to SEATTLE in May for a variety of events at Saint Mark’s Episcopal Cathedral! I will be offering a workshop on Saturday, May 4th and preaching + offering a 20’s & 30’s event on Sunday, May 5th! I’ll be preaching at the 9:00AM & 11:00AM Sunday services. If you’re in the Seattle area, I hope I see y’all very soon!