Fierce Love (Erin Jean Warde)

My heart is broken and I need a prayer for this wilderness. I offer this to you, because maybe you, too, need a prayer for this wilderness. A prayer to fiercely love you as you try to fiercely love.

Today’s art is “Vision” by Joseph Vogel.

Fierce Love

Friends,

I am in unknown emotional territory.

For all of 2023, I struggled with the deep, internal depression of grieving my sister, Hazel. I think, in many ways, I could not feel anything else, for anything or anyone else. I am finite, after all.

I prayed deeply for a better 2024 — for a year of not forgetting my grief, never forgetting her, but for a year in which I could hold that alongside the rest of my life, in a more sustainable way. I asked God to help me figure out this new way of life.

And it came. In ways I can’t describe — like a long knocked door opening — I felt my soul lift a little bit in January. Suddenly, kairos and chronos didn’t feel so unfamiliar to one another. Rarely do I expect God to sync with my Google Cal, because it’s a recipe for divine disappointment, but it happened. I asked for 2024 to be different and it has been.

However now, because I am able to hold this never ending grief alongside the rest of my feelings, the rest of my feelings have come flooding back. I feel joy, which is welcomed. I feel interest, which I have yearned for. I feel hopeful, which I have prayed for like manna.

But I’m also able to feel other grief again, for the rest of the world. So I feel the world’s pain deeply, and now it couples with the grief that will always sit in a corner of my heart reserved for her. I’m burdened and broken in spirit.

I cannot look away from genocide.
I cannot look away from the government’s choices that I feel only exacerbate our world’s pain.
I cannot look away from Nazis marching in Nashville, my home.
I cannot look away from the murder of beloved Nex Benedict in Oklahoma.
I cannot look away from the atrocities committed against this fragile earth, our island home.

My heart is broken and I need a prayer for this wilderness.

I went looking for one, and I found myself flipping through the pages of Jan Richardson’s The Cure for Sorrow: A Book of Blessings for Times of Grief. I offer this to you, because maybe you, too, need a prayer for this wilderness.

A prayer to fiercely love you as you try to fiercely love.

“Fierce Blessing” by Jan Richardson

Believe me when I say
there is nothing
this blessing would not do
to protect you,
to save you,
to encompass you.

This blessing
would stand between you
and every danger,
every evil,
every harm
and hurt.

This blessing
would dare
to wade with you
into the waters that come
offering life.

It would make
a way for you
through the waters that come
threatening death.

I cannot explain
how fierce
this blessing feels
about you,
but I can tell you
it has more than pledged
itself to you;
it would lay down
its life for you
and not once
look back in regret
nor go in sorrow
for what it has chosen
to give.

And you—
so deeply blessed,
so utterly encompassed—
what will you save
in turn?

Not because
it is owed,
but because
you cannot imagine
failing to pass along
this grace
that casts its circle
so wide,
this love
that flows
so deep
through this perilous
and precious life.

Love y’all,
EJW

Reclaiming Our Faith: Seeking God Through Creativity — March 5, 2024 (Washington National Cathedral in Washington D.C.)
I’m so excited to be speaking at Washington National Cathedral as part of their Lenten program. If you’re in the DC area, I’d love to see you! I can’t wait to pray & explore creativity together!

Lent can be a daunting time, urging us to reflect on our shortcomings and revealing painful experiences with faith, God, the Church, and the world. Join us as we seek a deeper relationship with God and faith through creativity and the creative process. We’re invited in this season to be brave, vulnerable, and reclaim our faith through creativity. We will explore our relationship with God and faith with our guests through the mediums of visual art, music, poetry, writing, and imagination.

Please note: Register if you’d like to have dinner as part of the program. If not, you can just show up for the lecture!

Use Discerning Sobriety Course for Lent

If you observe Lent, consider being guided by my course — Discerning Sobriety — for this season. You will get an email every day for 40 days, based on when you sign up.

• Maybe you want to give up alcohol for Lent — this course offers insight as you take a break from alcohol for spiritual reasons.

• Maybe your Lenten discipline is just to bring mindfulness into your relationship with alcohol — this course is a great way to do that!

• Maybe you have a group who wants to give alcohol up for Lent together or explore mindfulness around alcohol together — reach out and let’s discuss group rates!

If this course feels financially impossible for you right now, please respond to this email and we will figure it out. <3