integrity & social media (erin jean warde)

Integrity means being the same person no matter what room I enter. Standing inside the room of social media, I’m trying to figure out how to be myself in this room too. (& A shoutout to Amelia Hruby!)

Today’s image can be found here.

integrity & social media

Right now, I am in the intensity of preparation for book launch, because my book comes out in LESS THAN A MONTH, which I can barely fathom. (April 18th is Sober Spirituality Day — mark your calendars, lol!) I’m overwhelmed with gratitude when I think of all the support I’m receiving, whether it’s through people sharing my posts online, interviewing me for their podcast, asking to review my book, and more. Even just hearing people say “your work is important” touches me on a soul-level.

I’m also feeling the intensity of “building my platform” on social media. As many of you know, I’ve been discerning my relationship with social media for quite some time. I chose How to Do Nothing for one of our book clubs, because it was part of the discernment. I also try to periodically take breaks from social media.

Last week, I was hanging out with the Ray of Light Community and serendipitously someone brought up where they are in this same struggle with social media. I did not expect the conversation to go down this path, but I was deeply blessed by the communal conversation around social media in our lives.

I shared with the community my great tension: Sharing my work through social media is part of how I keep a roof over my head. I’ve been self-employed for almost 2 years, and I’m SO proud of how I have been able to do this for almost 2 years! That said, if I’m being completely honest, I live paycheck to paycheck (and I don’t actually get a paycheck — so I have very little awareness of when money might be coming my way). And very importantly: I absolutely love what I do, and this is exactly what I am supposed to be doing. But social media being one of the primary ways I share my work, and thus keep myself fed and housed, makes changing my relationship with social media far more complex.

I know there are very successful businesspeople who leave social media. But when I see it happen, it’s often people who already have tons of followers, so they have a captive audience who will continue to support them, but using other avenues. As someone who is not that popular, I’m still growing my reach, and growing my reach is what will allow me to get to a place financially where I can do more than just keep myself housed and fed.

Let me also say: There is profound privilege in being able to do this work and be housed and fed! So please don’t hear me belittling the privilege I have in my vocation.

I don’t have a bow to tie on the end of this — I am just a person in the chaos of the question.

One of the big things I wrestled with in my sobriety is the question of integrity. I knew drinking felt like it was outside of my integrity, that it sometimes made me act outside of my integrity, and that my desire for sobriety was a desire to be fully inside my integrity. But then I had to learn what integrity means for me, how it takes form in my life. I came to the conclusion that for me, integrity means being the same person no matter what room I enter.

Now, standing inside the room of social media — especially related to how I share my work, how I “grow my platform” — I’m trying to figure out how to be myself in this room, too. How to show up to this space without compromising myself and my soul in the process. How to stay inside my integrity while simultaneously naming that I’m allowed to want a solid financial ground underneath me; I’m allowed to have dreams like home ownership and a vacation.

Again, no bows to tie today. I’m not leaving social media any time soon, and I don’t know if I ever will. I do know I’m very consciously trying to figure out how to show up on social media in a way that is fully inside my integrity. Surely there must be a way to share my work in the world and not compromise my work in the process. No, nothing tidy here; today I’m naming the challenge, asking the question, being transparent about the struggle behind the scenes.

In closing, I am especially grateful for the work of Amelia Hruby. She has free resources like 100 Ways to Share Your Work Without Social Media, a Leaving Social Media Toolkit — grab both on her website — and she even offers the Off the Grid: Leaving Social Media Without Losing All Your Clients Podcast. Again, I’m not leaving social media right now, and I may never. Plus I’ve only scratched the teeny tiny surface of her wisdom. But practically, it can’t hurt to also learn ways to share my work outside of social media. And internally, her work is helping me release some of the “going viral and getting a huge following on social media is the only way you’ll ever be able to have a solid income” fear and feeling, which is really good for my soul, because it helps me stay inside my integrity — on social media and off. So, if today’s newsletter resonates with you, join me as I sit at the feet of Amelia’s wisdom.

With love & care,
EJW

Q&A

I’m always trying to think of ways my Substack can be a free resource to those who are looking for low to no cost care. For this reason, I’m inviting questions! If you have a question rumbling around that could use some support, please fill out the form below. I won’t promise to answer every question, but I look forward to seeing what’s on your mind!

I’ll answer questions on Substack and possibly my socials. Please note: I will share the question, but I will not share the identity of anyone who asks! <3

Sober Spirituality releases 4/18! grab your copy today :)

GOODREADS is giving away FIVE copies of my book! There are already 300+ people signed up & the giveaway started today! Enter for your chance to win — ends 4/18, the day of release!

Join me for an event partnering with Stevenson School for Ministry in the Episcopal Diocese of Central Pennsylvania! (I seem to have an ongoing partnership with PA and I love it!)

This is event is on Zoom, so anyone can come. I hope I see you March 29, from 7:00-8:30EST.

Please note: This event is now free!

About this offering: This workshop will explore the importance of hospitality in Christianity, name the current challenge our culture faces with alcohol, and talk through fun and thoughtful ways churches can grow in showing compassion toward those who don't drink. Churches growing in hospitality to sober people serves not just to change our churches for the better, but to grow them, as churches can become safe places for sober visitors and their friends.

This workshop will meet for 90-minutes on Zoom. The Rev. Warde will share her experience and offer resources. The content presetnation will be recorded. A brief question time will also be included at the end and will not be recorded for distribution.

The cost of this workshop offsets the operating costs of the Stevenson School for Ministry. SSFM is dedicated to the lifelong learning and discernment processes of all Episcopalians in the Diocese of Central Pennsylvania and beyond.